Hi, I’m Robert Lee Roy Hobbson. I own The Silent Pagoda. I write stuff.
I’m not going to waste your time – I’m going to tell you just like it is.
This is Lindy Thackston. She works here too.
Lindy’s been nominated for Ms. Twitter December or some such. I don’t know what that is. And I don’t really care to. But Lindy’s all aflutter about it, so here we are.
I won’t lie: she’s a pain in my ass. She steals all the spotlight & booze. But it’s not all bad. She also swears like a trucker, has no ties to al Qaeda, and isn’t an obnoxious bitch. If that’s what you’re looking for in an IndyCar pit reporter, then there you go.
Look. Charles Burns once stabbed me in the head with a shovel. And Dave Lewandowski sends me threatening letter-bombs every week hoping that I’ll die & not work here anymore. So if you don’t want to vote for Lindy, it won’t hurt my feelings.
So head on over there and vote for her. Or don’t. I don’t care.
By outtaphase, December 29, 2009 @ 9:20 pm
You’re gettin’ soft man. Do you have any idea where you could have gone with this parody? Oh wait, I think you do.
By lindy thackston, December 29, 2009 @ 9:23 pm
this just might be the most you’ve ever complimented me… i’m going to print it and frame it. next to my ms twitter __ place award.
By George Phillips (Oilpressure), December 29, 2009 @ 9:32 pm
I…I’m…speechless.
By Brian McKay, December 29, 2009 @ 9:44 pm
Hey! Now we who don’t reside in Indiana can see what you look like — like a younger, disgruntled Al Gore. BTW, XLNT Photoshop work!
By Sarge, December 29, 2009 @ 9:52 pm
Greatest. Pitch. Ever.
By Larry, December 29, 2009 @ 9:57 pm
I always pictured Lindy as a single-wide girl not a double-wide princess, lol. Great website.
By Del, December 29, 2009 @ 11:24 pm
Well, from reading your column, which probably is from a misguided youth, I can understand your misjudged lindypendanthoughts reactional comments. So I’ll stay on Lindy’s side and continue to vote her into celebrity Tweeter status! And Brian’s right – you do look like a twin of Al Gore. Have a nice day!
By lindy thackston, December 29, 2009 @ 11:37 pm
well @royhobbson… i have now moved up from number 12 to number 11… with number 10 in reach… the power of the silent pagoda never ceases to amaze me
By Leigh O'Gorman, December 29, 2009 @ 11:58 pm
Done and done!!
By cappy, December 30, 2009 @ 12:19 am
You had me at “she isn’t an obnoxious bitch”. Works for me! Time to vote!
By Stephen James, December 30, 2009 @ 1:17 am
Swears like a trucker? That’s worth a vote. I’m on it.
By outtaphase, December 30, 2009 @ 1:37 am
Speaking of “swears like a trucker”, where’s our ’09 outtake reel? I know damn well this must exist. Who’s hiding the booty?
By Jason Mcveigh, December 30, 2009 @ 6:23 am
Al Gore? How about Jack Del Rio from the Jacksonville Jaguars. Especially that first picture.
By Row Jimmy, December 30, 2009 @ 8:58 am
I called that number and asked for Roy. They cursed and threatened to hurt me if I called back. Wrong number?
Keep voting! “Every 20 Minutes” is our motto!
By P Daddy, December 30, 2009 @ 9:32 am
I just went and voted and I have one observation, the other “Ms Twitter December” candidates have much more seductive photos. So Lindy, even though I think you’re beautiful on the indside, the rest of the world only cares about the outside. you might want to make a change if you really want to win “Miss Twitter Dececember”, not that I really care what hot, sexy, seductive photo you put up.
By Carrie, December 30, 2009 @ 9:48 am
I take it back, Roy. You don’t look like my real dad. You kinda look like the dude that played Eddie Martell in The Replacements only less douchey.
By Roy Hobbson, December 30, 2009 @ 9:50 am
from reading your column, which probably is from a misguided youth, I can understand your misjudged lindypendanthoughts reactional comments …
… and one more thing: THAT RED FIST UP THERE APPEARS FAKE!! THAT’S NOT A REAL FIST HOLDING A SPATULA!! YOU MADE THAT UP, HOBBSON!! You can’t trick me! Nice try, jerk face.
By lindy thackston, December 30, 2009 @ 10:04 am
thanks for the votes everyone… p daddy, i actually had changed my pic to the one i use for facebook but it messed up the pic on the vote page so i had to leave it alone till contest is over! HA -i am happy to even be top 25, unbelievable where we are at… indycar fans don’t mess around apparently…
By Carrie, December 30, 2009 @ 10:38 am
I’ve been voting for Lindy like crazy. I’m hoping her prize would be a date with Mr. Twitter December and Maksim Chmerkovskiy has that in the bag. Never say I never tried to hook a fellow lady up. Plus I owe her for letting me know that the only reason to sit through Gamer was to see Gerard Butler nekkid.
By MeganRN, December 30, 2009 @ 10:39 am
I wish some handsome boy would call *me* “not an obnoxious bitch.” Lucky girl, that Lindycar. Sigh. I guess I’ll go vote now.
By Carrie, December 30, 2009 @ 1:38 pm
I’d hit it!
By P Daddy, December 30, 2009 @ 1:58 pm
Hey Roy, who’s Miss SP December?
By Riss, December 30, 2009 @ 2:20 pm
Well Hobbson, I voted for Lindy, but I almost didnt. Mrs Dog the Bounty Hunter is on that list also. While Lindy entertains us on Versus and with her occasional appearances in the Pagoda, Dog and his wife keep iceheads off the streets of Hawaii. They keep an epidemic in check! Step it up, Thackston.
By Roy Hobbson, December 30, 2009 @ 2:32 pm
PDaddy — Mrs. Hobbson is hereby crowned the inaugural Miss SP. She puts up w/ quite a bit so you all can frolic here & do whatever it is you do. Plus, she’s still smoking hot. That’s win win, and it’s time she got her due.
Riss — I like the cut of your jib.
By Jason Mcveigh, December 30, 2009 @ 2:47 pm
I’ve just realised how much I’m struggling without indycar during this off season. It’s late December and the best I can cling to is hoping Robby Gordon wins the Dakar Rally and Lindy Thakston wins Ms.Twitter December. Good luck Lindy!
By Larry Phelps, December 30, 2009 @ 2:50 pm
I don’t mean to interrupt, but Texas Tech just fired their football coach because he made a player stand in a dark utility room. WTF is wrong with this country? I hope the Paraguayans never invade us, we’ll just roll over.
By Larry Phelps, December 30, 2009 @ 2:56 pm
Oh, I probably should have mentioned I fully endorse Mrs. Hobbson’s candidacy for Miss SP. I had the pleasure of dining alfresco with Mrs. H back in August. Let’s just say the chardonnay flowed freely and the food while filling was a bit pedantic. But, the woman sounded like Redd Foxx during is Vegas stand up routine. Raunchy material to say the least.
By Carrie, December 30, 2009 @ 3:30 pm
Internet Hubby Jason: I was just trying to convince Hobbson he needs to watch Dakar! Of course, I was mostly trying to convince him over to the darkside to be a Robby fan.
By Jason Mcveigh, December 30, 2009 @ 4:03 pm
Internet wife Carrie: I think Roy should watch the Dakar too. Its not as good an event as the Indy 500 or Wrestlemania but it plugs a vacant winter hole.
By Jason Mcveigh, December 30, 2009 @ 4:07 pm
How did a supportive blog for Lindy Thackston degenerate into talk of Texas tech football coaches, the Dakar and Wrestlemania? Oh yeah I forgot, it’s the Pagoda.
By Heit Harrelson, December 31, 2009 @ 12:00 am
Roy – any chance we can conduct the polling in Florida? Even money we can swing that vote to our liking.
By P Daddy, December 31, 2009 @ 10:48 am
What’s the record for posts Roy? We might be approaching it. BTW, you’re grave attempt at getting lucky with the better half is desperate and deplorable. You have thrown your journalistic integrity aside to hopefully get some. (did I just say Roy had journalistic integrity?) Anyway, my thoughts are that Miss SP December needs to at least make one post to validate her appointment, so bring it on Mrs. Hobbson, lets’ see what you got!
By Brian, December 31, 2009 @ 2:40 pm
Peyton Manning had that same look on his face during the fourth quarter against the Jets.
By Coz, January 4, 2010 @ 3:35 pm
I finally get a chance to sleep on the job, and look what I missed.
By Stacey, March 8, 2010 @ 12:15 am
This is the reason I read silentpagoda.com. Stunning popsts.