Archive for July, 2009

An Entire Country Remains Unimpressed, Mr. Wise

Posted by Roy Hobbson on July 24th, 2009 under Off Topic, Roy Hobbson  •  3 Comments

Meh. Another leaping, juggling, bare-handed grab off a dead sprint to **YAAAAAAAWN** rob a homerun in the top of the 9th and thus save the 18th perfect game in Major League history? How very pedestrian & unoriginal. Throw it on the pile with the others, won’t you?  [shuts off sarcarsm spicket] HOLY SWEET JESUS IN THE ON-DECK CIRCLE [...]

Breaking News

Posted by Roy Hobbson on July 23rd, 2009 under Uncategorized  •  9 Comments

We’re being told that this here is Dario Franchitti’s car for Edmonton — and it appears to be sponsored by “Vaseline Men Lotion.” For more on the story, let’s go now to the Pagoda’s Chief Track Correspondent & our resident old-school badass who often slays bears for sport using only his massive forearms, AJ Foyt. AJ?

You Will Heed Darrell Waltrip’s Wisdom, Or You Will Perish

Posted by Roy Hobbson on July 21st, 2009 under Roy Hobbson  •  11 Comments

You know who I listen to when it comes to describing what it’s like to drive an Indy car? I listen to someone who’s never done it, obviously. I listen to Darrell Waltrip: Apparently, and I’ve never driven an Indy car, but apparently it’s a lot easier to get out of a stock car and [...]

Monday Afternoon Randomness (Vol. 62)

Posted by Roy Hobbson on July 20th, 2009 under Monday Afternoon Randomness, Off Topic, Roy Hobbson  •  10 Comments

{Federal Aviation Administration weekly press conference} United States Airlines Czar:  … and our hope is that we will one day eliminate catastrophic bird strikes in our lifetimes. Any other questions? You there, what say you? Me: Hi. My name is Roy Hobbson, and I genuinely detest flying. I hate everything about it. I hate the claustrophobia. [...]

Airing of Grievances, Vol. I (Filling the Void)

Posted by Roy Hobbson on July 17th, 2009 under Airing of Grievances, Roy Hobbson  •  13 Comments

With the Toronto race being the rip-roaring dandy that it was, we were all left quite … contented? Is that the right word? It must be. It has to be, for we have nothing to complain about. Nothing we would change. No threats of violence to make, nor seething frustration to suppress. And that’s just not right. Nor healthy. Not for us. No, [...]

Another Glimpse Into Paul Tracy’s Vast Reservoir of Awesome

Posted by Roy Hobbson on July 16th, 2009 under Roy Hobbson  •  10 Comments

We know that Paul Tracy is exceedingly boss. And we know that if he ever cared to hear what you think of him, he’d beat it out of you — with a picnic table. And we know that IndyCar desperately needs him on a full-time basis. What we DON’T know? Well, we don’t know his driving habits away [...]

The Open Championship is Underway, A Smashing Good Show

Posted by Roy Hobbson on July 16th, 2009 under Off Topic  •  6 Comments

It’s that most delightful time of year again, where 2-story pot bunkers and 48-degree windstorms cause havoc for the world’s best golfers. But not for Old Tom Watson, apparently (shown here hitting his mashie out of the greenside trap on #4 this morning). He shot a tasty little 65 — and then quickly dozed off in the pressroom barcalounger. You can watch listen to [...]