{EJ Viso pulls into his pit stall during testing at Barber Motorsports Park} Hunter-Reay: Hi there, mister!!!! I’m Ryan! Ryan Hunter-Reay!!!! You must be Ernesto!!!! We’re car-buddies now!! Sharing is caring!!!! Say, friend … would you mind if I take ‘er for a spin?!?!? I promise I’ll keep ‘er under 240!!! Hahahahaha! That’s a little racing joke!! Viso: [...]

Collective Soul The Cranberries Spin Doctors Goo Goo Dolls Ace of Base Chumbawamba Ben Folds Five Gin Blossoms Soul Asylum Maroon 5 Candlebox 3 Doors Down (At least, according to TrackForum.com they are.) Ahhhh, yes. 3 Doors Down. Makes sense, I suppose. Because frankly, when I’m trying desperately to brand my race as a premier global event that’s definitely NOT hanging on [...]

From now until the start of the season some 209 days from now, we’ll be examining the various personalities of IndyCar through their completion of the famed Pagoda Questionnaire. (Or — if you want to get all technical about it — how I IMAGINE they’d answer had I actually sent these out, as intended.)   [...]

It’s a glorious week in America. For it is ”Championship Week,” where we’re completely immersed in highly compelling college basketball games. Where maybe it’s not the best basketball going … but where it’s certainly the most crazed. Where teams you’ve never heard of from the Atlantic Sun and Patriot and Big Sky Leagues try desperately to punch their tickets [...]

Is this how ALL IndyCar offseasons are???? So painfully desolate and dull and completely void of meaningful activity??? This is madness, I say! BLOGGING MADNESS!!! It’s been 1,644 days since last season ended. Or so it feels. And worse still, I’ve been– WAIT!! WHAT’S THAT?!?!?!?!?! IS THAT ST. PETERSBURG I SEE?!?!?!?! THERE … OFF IN THE DISTANCE!?!? [pointing toward a dead [...]

Feeling run down??? Need a quick boost??? Want to be more productive at work while taking a hallucinogenic trip through time & space??? Then pick up a few quarts of Herbalife’s Visoberry Power Juice®!!!! We didn’t just sign EJ Viso to a hollow endorsement deal … WE HIRED HIM TO MAKE THE SINGLE GREATEST, MOST F–KED UP NUTRITIONAL DRINK ON [...]

{speed training on Foyt’s Hockley, Texas ranch} Foyt: Time to quicken you up, Victoria. Hope you don’t mind snappin’ an arm bone or two. Vitor: I don’t like where this is going.