{EJ Viso pulls into his pit stall during testing at Barber Motorsports Park}
Hunter-Reay: Hi there, mister!!!! I’m Ryan! Ryan Hunter-Reay!!!! You must be Ernesto!!!! We’re car-buddies now!! Sharing is caring!!!! Say, friend … would you mind if I take ‘er for a spin?!?!? I promise I’ll keep ‘er under 240!!! Hahahahaha! That’s a little racing joke!!
Viso: [gets out, says nothing ... urinates on pit road]
Hunter-Reay: Thanks, car-buddy!! [gets in behind the wheel] When I’m finished here, we’re going to – SWEET SAFETY VIOLATION!!!!!!!!! What is this?!?!?!?! [pointing]
Viso: A Nintendo Gameboy.
Hunter-Reay: Why’s it duct-taped to the steering wheel?!?!?!
Viso: I dunno. ‘Cause glue didn’t really work, I guess. Do you have any beer?
Hunter-Reay: [alarmingly looking around inside of cockpit] And what’s that?!?!
Viso: A railroad spike.
Hunter-Reay: And that?!?!
Viso: February’s “Barely Legal.”
Hunter-Reay: And that?!?!?!
Viso: Cow shit shaped like Arthur Ashe Stadium.
Hunter-Reay: Oh dear. And that?!?!?!
Viso: A javelin.
Hunter-Reay: That?!?!?!
Viso: A human hand.
Hunter-Reay: [vomits] And those?!?!?!
Viso: Empties.
Hunter-Reay: And that?!?!
Viso: [yawns] A freshwater eel.
Hunter-Reay: And that?!?!
Viso: A jar of homemade cough syrup.
Hunter-Reay: Sweet Jesus what’s that?!?!
Viso: A musket rifle.
Hunter-Reay: And that?!?! …
… to be continued (???????????????????????)
By P Daddy, March 20, 2009 @ 9:55 am
those cockpits are deceptively big when you’re only 5′2″ 130.
By husker, March 21, 2009 @ 1:22 pm
I sincerely doubt that EJ keeps a freshwater eel in the car. The story lost credibility at that point. I’m sorry.